Cured !!!!!!!!!!!!

Cured. What a fabulous word. My new favorite verb. Dr. Mounger, Dr. Hatcher's partner who set up the robotic surgery for him and assisted came to do rounds this morning and said I'd go home around 2pm today. He said it would take about a week for the pathology report. Dr. Hatcher told Judy after the surgery that everything looked clean, took a few nodes for biopsy, didn't see any obvious cancer spread. Then just before discharge Dr. Mounger called the hospital room at St. Mary's and told Judy that the pathology report was in (maybe some special treatment for a doctor?) and there was no cancer in the nodes or outside the capsule and that my cancer is cured. Surreal. I am in shock. I'll write more later. Love and thanks to all those who care about me and prayed for me. It worked! I have taken one pain pill yesterday, none today. Hard to believe I've had major surgery.
Lane

The antidote to helplessness

I am reading Martin Seligman’s excellent book “Learned Optimism.” He pioneered the theory of learned helpnessness and depression. Simply put if whatever you do doesn’t work, you learn how to be helpless and give up. In an experiment with 3 groups of dogs, he made a sound followed by a shock. In the first group the dog could press a button with his nose and wouldn’t get shocked. In the 2nd group (helpless) they were “yoked” to the first group but nothing they did would prevent a shock. The 3rd control group had no shock. They they put them in a room with a low wall and ran the experiment. The first group was exposed to the noise and they jumped over the wall to keep from getting shocked. The control group jumped over the wall. The “helpless” group gave up and 85% of the dogs wouldn’t jump over the wall and just sat there and got shocked. Think of poverty, living in a dictatorship, being abused, being imprisoned as examples of chronically being unable to affect your environment. But what about the 15% of the “helpless” group who jumped the wall and those people who prosper in the face of adversity? They’re the optimists. They are the ones inoculated against getting depressed. His other point which I wrote earlier about is that the other significant factor in depression is rumination. He pointed out that women have more depression than men because they think about their problems. Seligman says if a person loses his/her job, the woman thinks about what she did wrong. The man is much more likely to take action and even if it’s “bad” action like arguing with their wife, gambling, violence or some other acting out (or healthy action like I did home repairs) they are avoiding the depression-inducing rumination. So I spent the morning flying my radio-controlled helicopter and watching TV with my son Jeremy and friend Terry. Note that this is not denial, which is the substitution of a wish-fulfilling fantasy for reality. I know my diagnosis and what’s in store tomorrow. I just am not going to dwell on it.

The Reluctant Fraternity

Thanks to Donny Pember for getting me in touch with his friend Mike. Mike had the da Vinci robotic surgery in February and told me how relatively easy it was, got his catheter out early in 8 days and went dancing at a wedding on day 9 which sounds good to me. He gave me lots of encouragement and nitty gritty details, said that I'd joined the group of men known as the Reluctant Fraternity. If only I could dance but I'd be willing to learn in exchange for losing the catheter early.
Connections are what nourishes us. I have read many a patient a chapter in that old best-seller Everything I Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten by Robert Fulgum. It concerns a child hiding in a pile of leaves under his window while playing hide-and-go-seek and the others are giving up on him. He considers setting fire to the pile but just decides to yell, "Get found, kid!" He describes the grownup version, cites a physician who got cancer, decided to tell no one including his wife and family until the end. Some people said he was courageous but his family was privately very angry with him, felt betrayed. I am not advocating hiding. Tell someone. Tell a lot of someones. It comes back many-fold.

13 Days
I promised to make another post prior to surgery. Thirteen days and counting, morale still high. Not much news to report, did my drive-by orientation at St. Mary's. Another cute nurse story - the screening RN told me we're neighbors in Louisville. She lives on Buck drive off Topside. I told her that used to be THE PLACE at Christmas in Louisville, almost every house for 3 blocks heavily decorated with lights and yard stuff for the season. She said it was her first house they bought and asked the realtor, "Is it common for houses to have so many outdoor outlets?" Guess they wondered what the heck the previous owner was doing electrically (in so many places) outside. Group topiary? Precision drill teams for weedeaters? Sad to say that this kilowatt-blowing pasttime has passed its time and few people put up lights anymore. Oh well, we still have the helicopter on Topside. Again, thanks for the prayers, support and positive thinking. Lane

Gone to Graceland

I'm in Memphis with two wonder pharmaceutical reps whose names are withheld to protect the innocent. We have time between talks and swing by Graceland. We don't have time to take the tour but I hear it's the gawdiest place on Earth. One of the ladies tells me she knew someone who was the plumber at Graceland who was called out to remove the toilet The King expired upon. I asked if it was for sentimental reasons but she said it was looking for forensic evidence. Let your imagination run on that a while. The other rep tells me Monday at lunch her neighbor's car hasn't moved in a month and they haven't heard from him and she's worried. Then I see her at suppertime and she tells me, "Good news, my neighbor is alive." It takes a second to recount the context. Memphis is a scary place so missing folks suggest foul play. Anyway I hear some good blues down on Beale Street, amazing for a Monday night and all in all a great 2 day distraction. Will write again before and after surgery June 25th. Continued thanks for all the support, prayers and blessings. Lane